Breaking up is hard to do, so count on the support of your community and the help of relationship experts to help you through. Take a peek at life after divorce.

Close Shop, Move On

"I didn't mean to drop that cyanide tablet in her new boyfriend's drink," he said.

There are many unhealthy ways to deal with the emotional ramifications of a divorce. Instead of using all that energy in a negative way, try to channel it into the process of transforming yourself through the transition. The best way to do this is to develop a plan to help lead you through the jungle of feelings before you wind up in an emotional quicksand. Buy a journal and get started now:

Document the Past

The Offspring

Like every other component of your divorce, there is both a business and emotional challenge in dealing with children during the process. Often in divorce, younger children become a bartering tool, and their well-being gets lost in the game of tug-of-war. Older children, even those far from the nest, often experience a huge emotional rollercoaster, and sometimes their views on their own relationships are affected.

Legal Eagle

Starting your divorce process without legal counsel is like biking without a helmet or going to a movie without popcorn -- people do it, but it seems a little risky. Always have initial consultations with a lawyer. However, there are ways to avoid ugly court trials by utilizing either mediation or arbitration.

Mediation

Money Matters

For some odd reason, most humans, especially women, have a reflex reaction to tragedies like divorce: They go shopping. While therapeutic outlets are recommended, this doesn't mean local clothing outlets. Every year, thousands of men and women are left in dire financial straits as the result of a divorce. Before you go buy that new breadmaker or flat-screen television, take a look at these tips to help prevent you from ending up financially injured:

Know Your Partnership's Value

First Steps

So it's official -- you are getting a divorce. Wait, don't head straight for the couch with bonbons and a box of tissues. Now is not the time to fall apart; it's a time to step up to the plate and take control of your situation, effectively managing your divorce and transforming yourself through this transition. You have to take care of business and, in the coming months, there will be plenty of time to take care of yourself, too. Here's what you need to do first:

Put on Your CEO Hat

The Six Dimensions of Divorce

It isn't easy to decide to end a marriage. And, unfortunately, making
the decision is only the beginning of the often difficult process of
divorce. During divorce, the legal, financial and emotional components
can both open the door to a better life for you and leave you feeling
emotionally exhausted and "broken."

Before you begin the divorce journey, it's important to understand the
different dimensions of the process, so you can chart your course with
knowledge and dignity. Once you're informed, you'll be better able to

Tips for Negotiating a Settlement

You wouldn't ask a stranger to plan your monthly budget and analyze your bank statements. But this is exactly what happens when your case goes to trial before a judge. "Only a fool goes to trial," says Iva Hauck Girtman, a certified financial planner and certified divorce planner in Lakeland, Florida. It's also a costly endeavor that can set you back tens of thousands of dollars in legal fees. Although negotiating can be grueling, you still have some control over the process.


Don't make hasty decisions

Wisdom from mayac

When two divorcees marry, four people share that bed.

Wisdom from mayac

A divorce is like an amputation: you survive it, but there's less of you -- Margaret Atwood

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