friendship

Murray Katz, 82, has made a transition that lies ahead for millions of Americans. "When I was growing up, I didn't see women who were in their 60s and 70s as women", he said recently. "Now, it's amazing. The men I know are all looking at 80-year-old women. They're our friends. We listen to them. We dance with them. We have sex with them when we can. It's beyond Read more...

"Endings seem to lie in wait," John O'Donohue wrote. His certainly did. He died in his sleep, January 3, 2008, on vacation near Avignon. He was just 53. I met John O'Donohue only once. I had read Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom, the 1997 book that made him deservedly famous. "Read" is wrong. At 100 words a minute, I had, over weeks, absorbed enough of this Read more...

I believe that poor self-esteem is at the root of most emotional problems common today. It is the catalyst. It is the common ingredient in so many miserable lives. It is the doorway through which a world of neurosis enters. Almost every single desperate emotional human circumstance can be directly traced back to someone's lack of adequate self-esteem, and this tragedy is made worse by its Read more...

The road to emotional recovery from divorce. It's often be unpredictable territory. One minute you feel fine and the next you're overwhelmed by all the residual feelings and the unnerving sense of change. Being prepared for those moments when you suddenly get bombarded with emotion can help you better catch your breath and get back on level ground. To help you get through the tough times, put Read more...

We forgive when we no longer need to blame ... Think about it. When you continue to blame, you avoid having to forgive. A powerful defense mechanism, blaming amounts to finding a target for your anger and frustration. It protects you from having to own up to your own shortcomings and your own contribution to the problems between you and other people. And by making relationship difficulties Read more...

"Can we be friends?" It's the dreaded four-word phrase that's a classic breakup line. But it's also an issue that must be faced when a relationship hits the rocks. In reality, the questions ought to be "Should we be friends?" and, if so, "How will we define that relationship?" Below are some points to ponder when facing the partnership-to-friendship Read more...

Although most of us have helped a friend through one kind of loss or another, it's normal to wonder how to provide effective assistance without seeming intrusive. According to Jeffrey E. Auerbach, Ph.D., a licensed psychologist in Ventura, Calif., "being a supportive friend in times of need involves a combination of listening, insight and helpful actions." At first news of a loss, Dr. Auerbach Read more...

My best friend in high school was a year older than I. Terry always led the way through life. She was the first to graduate, to move away, to marry, to have children -- and the first to die. It was the first time I faced the pain of losing someone my own age. Midlife affords a long view to two distant horizons. Terry's death let me see back to our beginnings, and forward to what awaits us Read more...