"You know you've found your soul mate when you connect and communicate with someone on the deepest levels," says Peter Gellerman, an unmarried Santa Monica, Calif. attorney. According to Gellerman, a soul mate "is one who makes us feel deep familiarity and affinity, even though the circumstances may not justify it, such as before long acquaintance has been established."
A soul mate "can be a friend, a spouse, a lover, a sibling, a parent, or an acquaintance you hardly know but recognize as a kindred spirit," says artist Layne Jackson, who is unmarried and lives in Chicago.
While soul mates may be romantic partners, they may also manifest as close and constant friends. And you might find more than one in your life. Gellerman happily reports that his several soul mates include a trusted male friend and a long-distance female friend.
"I have no doubt that my lover, who is also my best friend, is my soul mate," says Anita Hopkins, a milliner and jewelry designer based in Los Angeles. "We met in midlife and I figure we were destined to connect after we'd both had various relationships."
The joy of being a soul mate includes "knowing that there is someone who understands your essence, accepts it and celebrates it -- and vice versa," says Hopkins. "In a way, being a soul mate is a greater joy better than being in love, because romantic love can get confusing or fade, but if you're someone's soul mate, the feeling of closeness never changes; this is an eternal union."
"I've been married and widowed twice and both my husbands were soul mates," says Erna Lutz, who is retired and lives in Orlando, Fla. "I'm just one of the luckiest people I know. Some people spend their whole lives looking for their soul mate," she says, "and I found two."
- - - - -
Do you feel like your marriage might need help? Click the statement that best describes what's happening between you.
