Health
Searching for a Soulmate
Way back when, you pledged to spend your life with one person. Only now, through divorce or death, more and more ThirdAgers are finding themselves unattached. And everyone they know is married.
There are other singles out there, but you may not find them in the expected places. After all, your best bet of happy companionship is with someone who gets the same jokes and shares common values.
So unless you're a confirmed barfly, why would you look for a compatible mate in a nightclub or lounge? A Zogby poll of 1,004 adults nationwide found that 35 percent say the best place to find marriage prospects are at church and church-related events. Thirty percent suggested organized events within their community. The workplace and school were each cited by 13 percent of respondents.
Our midlife relationship expert Dr. Betty Polston concurs. "Even though we've grown up hearing that opposites attract, many research studies confirm that the more similar you are to your partner, the better chance you have of making your relationship work."
So Dr. Betty advises a 54-year old who is now single after 30 years of marriage to get involved in activities she loves. "Vow to get involved and fill up your life. If you build this involvement, new friends and lovers will come to you!"
Midlife singles who have re-entered the dating scene can help each other and at one of our online discussion, here's what was said: Host ClaireTX has stepped up to the altar three times. She says she's made her mistakes and discovered some winning ways to connect with the right someone.
IMME45 shares this wisdom: "Men at our age are going through physical changes as we are...Both sexes need to step back and acknowledge those differences then go within ourselves to make changes."
TEACHIN says, "It's only by interacting, talking, laughing, holding and loving that we know we are alive." The best strategy: "Get out there, go places, do things, see people. Dance, sing, laugh, LIVE!"
Dr. Betty's advice to a 50-something widow sums it up: a "positive attitude and openness will bring you rewards in the dating game."
There are other singles out there, but you may not find them in the expected places. After all, your best bet of happy companionship is with someone who gets the same jokes and shares common values.
So unless you're a confirmed barfly, why would you look for a compatible mate in a nightclub or lounge? A Zogby poll of 1,004 adults nationwide found that 35 percent say the best place to find marriage prospects are at church and church-related events. Thirty percent suggested organized events within their community. The workplace and school were each cited by 13 percent of respondents.
Our midlife relationship expert Dr. Betty Polston concurs. "Even though we've grown up hearing that opposites attract, many research studies confirm that the more similar you are to your partner, the better chance you have of making your relationship work."
So Dr. Betty advises a 54-year old who is now single after 30 years of marriage to get involved in activities she loves. "Vow to get involved and fill up your life. If you build this involvement, new friends and lovers will come to you!"
Midlife singles who have re-entered the dating scene can help each other and at one of our online discussion, here's what was said: Host ClaireTX has stepped up to the altar three times. She says she's made her mistakes and discovered some winning ways to connect with the right someone.
IMME45 shares this wisdom: "Men at our age are going through physical changes as we are...Both sexes need to step back and acknowledge those differences then go within ourselves to make changes."
TEACHIN says, "It's only by interacting, talking, laughing, holding and loving that we know we are alive." The best strategy: "Get out there, go places, do things, see people. Dance, sing, laugh, LIVE!"
Dr. Betty's advice to a 50-something widow sums it up: a "positive attitude and openness will bring you rewards in the dating game."
